‘Lazy parenting’ is about intentionally providing your child with opportunities to develop a sense of self-efficacy, which in turn bolsters confidence, independence & responsibility. It's the antidote to helicopter or snowplough parenting.
It's about mindfully stepping back to allow your child to struggle on their own for a minute rather than rushing in & rescuing. When parents step in prematurely when they deem a task too difficult children do not get the chance to learn what they’re capable of. It’s important that children have the time & space to work through challenges, deal with frustration & figure out solutions. I recently spoke to a woman who realised that her 14 year old daughter had never been required to do the dishes. She admitted to herself, horrified, that in 4 short years this child would be an adult... an adult who didn’t know how to do the dishes. If we anticipate & take care of their child's every challenge or need, our children lose out on the chance to develop basic life skills. Sometimes all this style of parenting involves is to be an ‘engaged supervisor’, making sure no one gets hurt & nothing catches fire. WAYS YOU CAN BE A LAZIER PARENT 1️⃣ Create a YES space Create a space in your home that allows them to freely explore anything & everything in it. It can be an entire room or an area of a room that you are able to contain. Fill it with age-appropriate items that do not require close supervision for safety. Then, step back. Depending on your child's personality/age, you may need to be physically present, but the point is that you do not direct or constrain the play. 2️⃣ Comfort with consequences Giving your child responsibility involves accepting that there will be times that they do not do what they need to do. Within reason, children should learn the natural consequences of their decisions. 3️⃣ Let kids be kids Life is learning. Learning to deal with challenges, learning to experience pain, learning to handle disappointment. It might break our hearts or mean we have to fight everything in us to not jump in & ‘fix’ our child’s difficulties. After all, this is how they become strong, capable & competent adults.
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